Sunday, June 03, 2007

Everyone's an expert

At work yesterday, an older man wearing a baseball cap adorned with an American flag approached my coffee and began telling a younger-looking woman, presumably his daughter, all about the different coffees, and about coffee in general. I came over and asked there was anything I could help them find, and the man regales me with his story.

"You see, I've worked for Nestle for 25 years, so I know coffee. I know coffee in and out."
"Oh, ok," I said, thinking to myself whether that was Maxwell House or Folgers (turns out it's neither, but I'll get to that).
He continues, "You've gotta blend your good beans here with some trash beans to give your coffee some heart." And before I could tell him everything that was wrong with that statement, he says, "that's a good American cup of coffee."
"I see," I reply, thinking that, if that's what an American cup is, I don't want to drink American coffee. So he blends a bunch of different coffees in his bag, regardless of the pricing differences, which I tell him is alright, and I mark the lowest price of what he got.
"Yeah, if you wanna drink Idi Amin's coffee, you've gotta throw some trash in there." At this point I'm thinking I'll have to ask one of my co-workers which country Idi Amin ruled, and if that particular nation was ever a coffee producing nation.

So he leaves, and I'm left processing everything that had just happened. I go over to one of my friends to ask about Idi Amin, and it turns out he ruled Uganda, which they all remembered because of the film The Last King of Scotland. And this morning I looked up which coffee company is owned by Nestle. It's Nescafe, which I should've seen coming. However, upon perusing the brands offerings, I notice a pattern, which is that all of Nescafe's coffees are all instant coffees, the lowest rung on the coffee ladder.

"I know coffee in and out."

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